To the tiny marks on my thighs, roads filled with tears and voices filled with lies To the hip bones that once protruded, a sweet reminder of what I was doing To the size 4 shorts crumpled in the corner, my worst nightmare but proudest moment wrapped up in three inches of denim To the … Continue reading An ode to my disorder
Tag: eating disorder recovery
A whole blabbering mess on recovery during quarantine
"It is okay if your body changes!!!" I've screamed to the rooftops. Texted friends. Said to my roommate on walks. Heck, I even told my dog that when the vet said he needed to lose six pounds. If you were to open up my brain right now I promise there are tiny little Presley's running … Continue reading A whole blabbering mess on recovery during quarantine
I’ve been hungry for three weeks
I wrote that sentence in my journal this morning. Three whole weeks of a rumbling tummy. Weird food aversions and fears. I babysit an (almost) three year old and when I watch her eat dinner she's eating more than me. A three year old. I think I've survived off of ice coffee and the occasional … Continue reading I’ve been hungry for three weeks
Step 1: Share Your Story
This week always holds a special place in my heart. In 2016 Theta gave me the incredible opportunity to share my eating disorder story for the first time publicly on the ELC blog. It was the most terrifying thing I have ever done, still to this day but I am eternally indebted to Theta … Continue reading Step 1: Share Your Story
Why I’m breaking up with Victoria’s Secret
It's a bit of old news, but Victoria's Secret lost my support after their Chief Marketing Officer, Ed Razek made comments about not including plus-size models on their runway. Why did he say the company sticks to such a generic slate of models? "Because the show is a fantasy," he said. Oh. So, you're telling … Continue reading Why I’m breaking up with Victoria’s Secret
Consumption
Can I tell you all something?? I've had a bridesmaid's dress hanging in my closet for two weeks. I haven't tried it on yet because I have been terrified of the outcome. Will it zip?? Will the fabric be snug around my stomach? Will it fit at all? I have been completely consumed by the … Continue reading Consumption
Processing
I’m lying in my bed....I’ve been here all day. I’m sick- and it took everything I had to send a text asking for the day off. But I’m proud of myself for doing it. I’m worried that people don’t believe I’m sick, just lazy. But that’s another story for another day. Anyways, I found myself … Continue reading Processing